I took a brief brake from blogging to be absolutely baffled by the world and those useless souls that take up precious oxygen within. My fascination of this group will give me feel for blogging in the years to come!
My Blogger page once introduced me as “The Original Desperate [Fire]house Wife.” And that is precisely what I was for three years…now I am the Ex-Desperate [Fire]house Wife out there, independently finding her way.
I am not one to air my dirty laundry. I want no sympathy, and I want no opinions. But when your privacy is breached and you have not personally made the situation well known, the gossip mills are free to turn. The last version I heard is that I was “whoring around which ruined my marriage and my husband left me.” I guess if people do not get their own explanation the pathetic ones need some sort of story to go on. Every marriage ending is tragic. Not every ending is twisted though. It is a shame really, taking someone else’s tragedy and making it seem tragically twisted…..
Rorie’s Story: I met the future firefighter @ church when my family moved to Mississippi. We started dating almost a year after we moved here. I was 14, he was 17. We lived maybe 12 houses away from each other throughout high school. Our parents were youth group leaders together and great friends. We had almost every Thanksgiving, both families all together, for 8 years. The firefighter actually proposed to me on one of those joint Thanksgivings and we were immediately able to share the news with our closets relatives. The famed “high school sweethearts” story. We had a dream wedding that my parents funded without batting an eye and a quaint honeymoon. We returned to a greater lifestyle than a 19 and 21 year old should expect: a house, an SUV, a sports car and a Chihuahua--seemingly perfect.
Everything takes work. We did not have to work terribly hard for the lifestyle we had obtained and that aided in both of us being selfish. We were selfish on so many accounts and didn’t put forth much “work” in building our life together or relationship. We just went with what we had already. Anything that proved to be effort was set aside. The mindset: we will have time to work on it later…
Later. It’s almost funny. I thought it, he thought it. We had all the time in the world to fix it. We would be the perfect married couple sometime in our 30’s maybe. We could be who we were or wanted to be for now.
It was drilled in our head’s that marriage was forever. It is drilled in most Christian’s heads. And I do not argue that. At the same time, I think that is why a lot of Christians get married so young. That is what you are supposed to do to live together and :gasp: have an intimate relationship. And that was what we wanted, so marriage is what we did.
From 14 to 22 and 17 to 24, there is obviously a lot of maturing. And if you do not make sure that you are both maturing towards the same ideals and dreams and growing together then thorns begin to grow in each person’s own garden. We grew to far apart to reach each other once we recognized and acknowledged the problems.
“State the obvious; I didn’t get my perfect fantasy. I realized you loved yourself more than you could ever love me” –Taylor Swift
I do not have to go any further into this because I know and he knows where we are at. And at this time we are both at peace with it.
We will not be bound together by children, or anything really but 8 years of memories. We have both expressed that we want the best for the other and have sucked up the cold hard truth that we are just not that. It is our reality and it is a blessing to get through this process cordially. My naive wish is that in the future we will be able to talk as friends, have better communication then than we did as husband and wife.
I am still not quite sure what part of my husband and I growing apart translated into me “whoring around.” But, in the end at least I am important enough to be the highlight of their conversations! To all of the pathetic people of the world, in dire need of entertainment: Whisper on!
The whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God.
Posted by
Priscilla
at
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Labels: Future MILF Thoughts, Reality Checks, Thin Thoughts
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hmmmm....
you must really have been whoring around because no one has said anything.
August 27, 2008 at 8:51 AM
Hope things work out for the best for both of you.
August 27, 2008 at 10:27 AM
ok, dh that was a complete coverup!
August 27, 2008 at 10:09 PM
It sucks that you feel you must explain.
But I do sincerely wish you well in this next phase of you life.
*bwah*
August 28, 2008 at 4:47 PM
you don't owe ANYONE an explanation. it's none of their damn bizness.
i'm sorry this has happened, but i wish you the best in the future, honey.
September 2, 2008 at 8:02 AM
sorry to hear all of this...love you.
September 2, 2008 at 9:50 PM