It seems like everybody I have talked to recently is not having a smooth week relationship wise, maybe it is something with the moon.... anyway various conversations have sparked more inquiries on my part...
I guess people are just used to what they grew up seeing. My parents have always shared everything (except minor details like the actual cost of my first wedding, etc.).
And like I said it may just be because that is how I grew up, but I think when you share a life together, then you should really share anything and everything in your life together. There is no "yours" or "mine," there is simply "ours."
It seems it probably used to be much more simple: when you got married, you combined everything.
In these changing times, people are living together far before marriage. What are the rules for combining things if you are just "shacking up?" And there are so many other issues that our parents never had to deal with, like in their days they didn't have to discuss odd technological privacy's like sharing myspace or e-mail account passwords.... do you merge these things along with everything else? Or is that a complete invasion of self and one thing that will eternally remain "mine?"
Also, I hear of more and more couples today having separate bank accounts from their spouse. You get married and "two bodies become one flesh," but your money doesn't mix? I just can't wrap my head around that. Maybe it is just easier because you live with the person for so long under those conditions that it just stays that way after the vows?
My ultimate question is what does it mean in these modern times to truly "share a life together?"
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Right there with ya! These things baffle me as well...
November 14, 2008 at 1:07 PM
Cami, we need to do some research and write a book!
November 14, 2008 at 1:34 PM
It all depends on what works with you.
November 17, 2008 at 9:23 AM