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I have a date most mornings in front of the vending machine with Mrs. Freshlys for her infamous Jumbo HoneyBun. My $0.75 morning treat. Heat up for 15 seconds, and it is a gooey goodness that can set your day off right. I get dirty looks as I consume this tasty treat in 2 minutes flat, with little regard for what it may be doing to my insides. I work with doctors; they warn me it is no good….but I ask inquisitively, have you had one lately….. ‘Tis Delish! Ok, so it has 580 calories, 43% of the daily value for total fat (28 grams), and 62% of the daily value for saturated fat. There is also 380 mg of sodium and 39 grams of sugars. I may die of clogged arties, but it brings me a smile. We will all make our own selections in life and I shall delight in my own personal vice- the bun. So Back up, and back off- or its gonna get sticky in here…

I associate myself with the word “chaos” as much as I do with my first name….I am chaos, but really, I create it for myself. I let myself get stressed, even though I know that it is not healthy, and I should not “sweat the small stuff.” –Obviously I need to read the book with the similar title. But It also really depends on what we value as the “small stuff,” if everything is an event for us then it is ok to seat it, huh?

Anyway, I have been trying to relax. I have been in my new job for almost 3 months and it is a joy. They put little to no pressure on me, and have commented on the pressure I put on myself. I am not used to this calm environment at all, and am attempting to not be so high strung. The following two songs from fabulous country radio are my current anthems for this feat:


Artist: Chesney Kenny
Song: Don't Blink
Album: Just Who I Am: Poets & Pirates

I turned on the evening news
Saw a old man being interviewed
Turning a hundred and two today
Asked him what's the secret to life
He looked up from his old pipe
Laughed and said "All I can say is."

--Chorus--
Don't blink
Just like that you're six years old and you take a nap and you
Wake up and you're twenty-five and your high school sweetheart becomes your wife
Don't blink
You just might miss your babies growing like mine did
Turning into moms and dads next thing you know your "better half"
Of fifty years is there in bed
And you're praying God takes you instead
Trust me friend a hundred years goes faster than you think
So don't blink

I was glued to my tv when it looked like he looked at me and said
"Best start putting first things first."
Cause when your hourglass runs out of sand
You can't flip it over and start again
Take every breathe God gives you for what it's worth

--Chorus--
So I've been tryin' ta slow it down
I've been tryin' ta take it in
In this here today, gone tomorrow world we're livin' in

--Chorus--

Naw, don't blink
Life Goes Faster Than You Think
Don't Blink...


Artist: Alabama
Song: I'm In A Hurry (And Don't Know Why)
Album: American Pride

--Chorus--

I'm in a hurry to get things done
Oh I rush and rush until life's no fun
All I really gotta do is live and die
But I'm in a hurry and don't know why

Don't know why I have to drive so fast
My car has nothing to prove
It's not new
But it'll do zero to sixty in five point two

--Chorus--
Can't be late,
I leave in plenty of time
Shakin' hands with the clock
I can't stop
I'm on a roll and I'm ready to rock

--Chorus--

Oh, I hear a voice
That says I'm running behind
Better pick up my pace
It's a race
and there ain't no room for someone in second place

Have you ever wondered what the hell is going through the minds of the employees at your local Subway? And ever noticed that they can never manage to cut the loaf of bread in even halves? No, if you order a six inch sandwich, there is always a wimpy half and a clearly larger half. Hmmm. Is there some subconcious reason for this mishap? I think so.......
I have used my keen ability to read these people and have finally determined that there are two different mind sets to these so called "sandwich artists." Please consider these observations:

(1) The smaller half giver is either thinking: "You are a skinny hoe, and probably will not eat this anyway!" -OR- "You really do not need to be eating at all, so this is all you get tubbers!

(2) The larger half giver is either thinking: "Biotch you need to go sit in the corner and eat, so eat this, ALL this!" -OR- "Better not be stingy with this mo fo or they may crawl across this counter and eat ME."

Harsh, huh? I do not know why these sandwich artists are so judgemental, but this prejudice goes on every day at a chain near you so take notice. But, we can solve all of the world's problems by urging loaves be cut in equal halves! Please do your part!